Junk Food For The Soul

The closer this movie gets, the more I see a little piece of my childhood dying. Sci Fi Wire has more details on the plot and where they are shooting. And if this article is legit, it doesn’t make me feel any better.

The film will offer background about the origin of the war between the Autobots and Decepticons. The plot will be set in motion when 18-year-old Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf) discovers his grandfather’s pair of century-old glasses, improbably laser-etched with a map and information about the location of a key artifact, the “Energon” cube, which he then tries to sell on eBay. The movie will follow five separate storylines, which will all converge with a final battle between the Autobots and Decepticons, starting at Hoover Dam and ending in an American city that looks a lot like Los Angeles.

And every photo I’ve seen so far is crap. Megatron has an anus for a mouth and looks like a cross between Spawn and some kind of plant creature. Poor Jazz went from a Porsche to a Pontiac Solstice? What, there wasn’t a more feminine car available? On the other side of the coin, Bumblebee got butched up a bit and is now the new Camaro.

Guess I shouldn’t have expected any different from Michael Bay. At least they brought back the original voice actor for Optimus (Peter Cullen).